Dogs' Dinner: 2014 End of Season Awards

Ordinarily, this results blog is to ensure Mad Dogs heroics are noted down for posterity, and to share news of our exploits with those sadly not present. Obviously, those present at games can usually remember the highlights of the day - at least for the ensuing weeks.

However, on this occasion, as well as marking down the notable highlights of the evening for posterity and absent friends, the blog is useful for those who were actually there. I certainly can't remember much of the evening and I suspect I am not alone. In fact, it would be better if the waiter wrote this up as I'm quite sure a reliable memory of the evening does not exist among the club members. For yet another year, Mad Dogs surpassed themselves as they set about drinking the Union, University and Schools Club of Sydney dry.

The lavish settings of the annual event - the Library dining room - were equalled by the bonhomie, hearty camaraderie and turn-out. At least that's the sense I have. The pictures certainly look like everyone was having fun. The blinding hangover I suffered the next day suggests that copious amounts of wine and beer were sunk. Probably.

So, in a complete absence of any anecdotal recollect, let's get down to the facts of the evening. The Treasurer, Ed Suttle, arose in between the first and second courses to give a report on the club's finances. Except he couldn't because he forgot his notes. Club Founder and President Giles Bourne also stood to say...something. To be fair to Giles, it may have been a quite Churchillian performance - "we played in Newtown, we played in Camperdown, we played in Birchgrove...Mad Dogs will never surrender" and so on - but I really can't remember.

Then, after the main course (I think it was) Sean Garvey stood up to share the outcome of his considerable research, mathmatics, navel-gazing and pondering. Most notably, Sean was keen to point out that 10 Mad Dogs players have a batting average of over 20, and 6 of those have an average over 25-­‐strong. Given batsmen retire at 25 and overall we played no more than 30 overs this is an admirable result - receiving much appalus.

After much cheering and delight at the year's other achievements, which equally I can't remember the detail of, Sean got down to the serious business - the awards, listed below with Sean's notes. Each recipient was required to down their drink in one, attempt a brief thank-you speech and receive a largely pointless and random gift - including, for example, a belt-buckle-puncher and a pack of mouse traps - the trading of which provided much entertainment later on and proved the open market is alive and well.

Awards:

Best overall batting performance: Billy Cutler

"Out of the 11 innings that Billy has played, been out only 4 times. Top score 75 (nine 4's , Fours 6's= 60 runs. Only 15 runs coming from singles..!)

Most improved batting performance: Anthony Cheshire

"In last two years 80% of runs has come in last 20% of games. More to come!"

Most unrealised potential: Nick Roberts and Mark Harvey

"With batting averages of 28 & 29 respectively both are forces to be watched."

Dark Horse: Jonathan JP Phillips

"143 runs and a batting average of 24 remind us why 50% of your matches are for the Aussies?"

Most "unique" batting performance: Giles Bourne

Amid 11 innings with only once topping 4, to suddenly make 25 was a quite memorable and startling result."

Biggest Surprise bowler: Marcus Timson

"The lazy lob leg spin works wonders. Don't try and slog him!"

Most (un) notable bowling performance: Keith Saunders

"Hit for 48 runs in one over. Some bowling performance."

Most improved bowling performance: Gareth 'your correspondent' Llewellyn

"He used to be really rubbish, now he's much better."

Overall, we were told, based on Sean's mathematically robust (?) "Performance Index", the Mad Dogs achieved a 112 per cent improvement over the course of the season which is, frankly, a very arresting statistic! Moreover half of the team improved their year-on-year improvement and only a quarter went backwards.

Following the awards, the Dogs laid waste desert and anything they could find to drink before they were banished to the basement where the snooker tables reside. Here an esky of beer was destroyed, the game of snooker was dishonoured, the English language defiled and compulsory sartorial elegance became ever more dishevelled. Finally at midnight, the evening and a very memorable season came to an end.

Well done Dogs, see you again all for the 2014/15 season and some more extension of the "Performance Index"!

More pictures of the evening can be found here: https://www.dropbox.com/sh/z6hdf8lnuovp6jn/AAD79lGyBScVb91U0I97TVNMa